XIII

Well twenty-two episodes later, I've finally finished off Rome.

Once you get over the shock of ridiculous amounts of sex and violence, the plot really shines through and it is fascinating. It is a complex web of deceit and the consequences of infinitesimal actions of the most infinitesimal people on the entire state. The characters are multi-faceted, however, and are simply so many shades of grey that there is no such thing as "good" or "bad." Even now, I sympathize with many of the villains and if anything, this show has helped clarify for me the intentions and reactions of people who become unbearably mundane in history books and actors manage to justify names (Brutus, Cassius, Cicero, etc.) as well.

The writing was great though any complaints would be directed towards the insanely accelerated pace of the second season and historical inaccuracies that I only managed to pick up because I know more about Octavian's life than I did about his father's. (Thank you, Allan Massie. Boring book, good facts.) I think we covered thirteen years (44 BC with Caesar's death to 31 BC, the Battle of Actium) in ten episodes. Even so, I'm pretty satisfied with how the show ended!

wax tablets

I really don't have a lot to say since we've had a pleasant day of clouds, rain, more clouds... you know after a very misleading spell of warm weather, thank you. On the upside, I've stayed in and have been working my way through the first series of Rome. Now, I honestly don't watch any TV, mostly because I have too much homework all the time and the only series I've been watching religiously is Flight of the Conchords and even that's set to end next Sunday. Sad. So with that preamble, let me bring you to the gist and nub (hub?) of the matter.

I know my sister has already done her top 5 reasons to watch the series, but here are my favorite characters and therefore reasons to watch the show. Some of them are pretty obvious like Vorenus and Antony so I've left them out of my list.

1. The newsreader: Whaaaat. This guy is amazing.
   
   
2. Titus Pullo: CAN WE BE FRIENDS? Besides all that, I also appreciate all his vulgar cursing upon the gods.
   
   
3. Caesar's slave, Posca: I like that he's got an ancient palm pilot known as a portable wax tablet for notes. For those who have not put two and two together yet, palm pilot = Celeste. Unfortunately, Celeste does not have a cool accent... in fact, I'm not sure she can still speak. I'll get back to you on that one. Meanwhile, Mars takes a crap.
   
   
4. Team Atia vs. Team Servilia: Your choice. I won't judge, but everyone else will.

Forever 21 BC

I'm not a big fan of fashion. Anyone can see that. It's aight. I never got swept up into the whole craze of buying clothes. I mean clothes - who needs them? Especially since there's so much of it. I'd rather wear a toga. Or maybe nothing at all. Actually, a toga would probably be better. So basically, I would rather be adorned in a giant sheet with some ancient Roman accessories.

Until recently, I thought the only place to buy ancient jewelery was on Ebay, or that shifty looking place inside the Garage. But lo and behold, there was someone somewhere who planned to sell ancient jewelery in a hip fashion store: Forever 21. What is Forever 21? I didn't know myself until on just moved in to the old Foot Lockers. But apparently, everyone else knew what it was. The main point is that they have a taste for coins. And not just any coins - ancient Roman coins.

Need a necklace with 17 Roman coins on it? No? Well, here's one anyway. What about a key fob? Yes - a key fob. Apparently saying a key chain or key ring wasn't cool enough for a bunch of Roman coins. No, Forever 21 sells Roman key fobs. And bracelets. And necklaces. It's so unneeded, so fake, so... AMAZING. 

Now quick, drive me to Forever 21, and give me about $20 and I'll buy everything. Because it's also that cheap.

Telemachus Sneezed

Dic, Duc, Fac, Fer - The four irregular imperatives in Latin. I'm convinced that the Romans had a sense of humor and some foresight so that both Dic and Fac can be yelled very loudly by Latin students.

And now for something completely different, but strangely related. HBO's Rome was possibly the greatest invention man has ever made. Except for maybe the roof. Roofs are cool. But Rome is 22 hours of proof that humanity has hope. And here are five reasons why:

5. Everything I ever learned about Roman history was from Rome. It's a true fact. It even taught me some Latin.

4. An awesome theme song. You can tell if a show's good by watching it's theme song. Like Yu-Gi-Oh! or Pokemon. Those were some ill songs.

3. British People. Who cares if the Romans didn't speak with a British accent? If the cast includes one British actor, the classiness of the film goes up two and a half points.

2. Titus Pullo. Enough said.

1. Best. Cast. Ever. Seriously - Kevin McKidd, Ray Stevenson, Simon Woods, James Purefoy, Alex Wyndham, Polly Walker, Indira Varma... and that fat guy who reads the news.

So to sum it all up, Rome = Epic Win. And what's this I hear about a possible Rome movie? I think there is a god.